Church Weekly
07 Jul 2024



Dear Members in Christ,

The importance of pre-marital counselling (Part 4) – Reverence for God’s holiness

In this series of articles about the institution of marriage, we have covered several key points about the importance of undergoing pre-marital counselling. The past articles dealt with the importance of pre-marital counselling. The three key areas of biblical instruction about marriage which have been covered in previous articles about pre-marital counselling are:

  • The theology of marriage – an institution by God and to be honoured
  • The scriptural teaching about the qualification for holy matrimony
  • The biblical role of the husband and the wife in the marriage relationship

In this article, we shall meditate upon the fourth and final point about pre-marital counselling, which is, the reverence for God’s holiness. Now, because the Christian marital relationship is holy, the Christian must be warned about biblical admonition about honouring the holiness of the marital relationship. For a couple to honour the holiness of the marriage, it is also the same as honouring and reverencing the holiness of God. For the Lord Jesus in rebuking the Pharisees point out their disregard for God’s holiness in permitting divorce for the whim of men.

“Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” Matthew 19:6

The marital relationship is not meant to be dissolved by the will of men. The reason the Mosaic law permitted it was because of the hardness and sinfulness of men’s heart.

A. Reverence for God’s Word

The Lord Jesus said, “but from the beginning it was not so.” (cf. Matthew 19:8). Although the Mosaic law had a provision for divorce, the Lord Jesus made it clear that by permitting divorce for every flimsy reason is sinful. The Lord Jesus pointed out their sinful and hardened heart is the root reason for divorce. 

 “He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.” Matthew 19:8

With the alarming trend of divorce in so-called “advanced” western nations, the pre-marital counselling course deals with this topic in some depth. Breakdowns in marriage relationship and divorce happens when men and women disregard God’s Word and its teaching about marriage. It happens when men and women disregard the matrimonial vows they have pledged. Dearly beloved, let us honour God’s Word and His holiness. God’s holiness is to be seen in the believer’s life, and the marital and familial relationship.

B. Safeguarding the purity and holiness of God’s people 

Honouring and reverencing God’s holiness means that a couple entering the marital relationship must be taught from the Scriptures to guard the holiness of their relationship (and their family as well).

The minister in a service for the Solemnization of Holy Matrimony will caution the congregation and the couple that marriage “therefore is not to be entered into unadvisedly, lightly, or wantonly.” Instead, a Christian couple ought to enter into a marriage relationship “reverently, discreetly, soberly, and in the fear of God, duly considering the causes for which matrimony was ordained.” The Bible is clear about how the covenant breakers, adulterers will be judged by God. 

“Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” Hebrews 13:4

God is holy and He demands holiness from His people. His Word exhorts, “be ye holy, for I am Holy.” (cf. 1 Peter 1:16 & Leviticus 19:2). Therefore, a couple entering into a marital relationship must be taught from the Scriptures of the expectations of holiness God has revealed in His Word. Those who disregard God’s Word fall into sin, and cause pain to themselves, resulting in divorce and broken families. God is gracious, He keeps and sustains the faith of His people. He protects them and keeps them in His ways.

Beloved, let us honour Holy Matrimony, a union which God has instituted. We must be ever mindful of our weaknesses. We must obey God and know His will for us.  Pre-marital counselling for the couple teaches them God’s instruction for a joyful and fruitful marital union. Husbands and wives that are strong in the faith will build strong families. We pray that the Lord Jesus strengthen His church, by building strong families in Calvary Jaya. Amen.

In His Service,
Rev. Lim Seh Beng, Pastor